Q Report; Wanted: Sexy Leg Dancing Presents.

Seeking athletic and talented dancers willing to wear stockings and a massive present box over their head to accompany individuals to meetings and parties. Must remain within adequate proximity to hear Offenbach's Infernal Galop played from a phone. When the can-can portion arrives, you will jump into the room, dancing in time until the song ends or you are instructed to leave.

Pay is $10 an hour with a minimum of one hour. Giant present and fishnet stockings provided. The giant present costume leaves little visibility and will be hot. Very hot. Please wear deodorant as a courtesy to other performers who share your giant present costume.

Serious applicants only. 

Provide a résumé and cover letter detailing relevant experience to: thechurchofq@gmail.com.

The Church of Q is an equal opportunity cult.